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Perfectionism (day 30 blogging with Effy Wild)

4/30/2021

2 Comments

 
I finished! I did miss 3 days, but I feel pretty good about keeping up.
I received my 2nd COVID-19 vaccination yesterday and felt great until about 2 hours ago. Now I'm hitting a wall and the floor, lol.  So I'm pulling out some recycled stuff.
Each Red Thread Circle has an inquiry, one I held when I first starting was around "Perfectionism".
I definitely suffer from this malady and I've noticed SO many painters in my workshops being SO hard on themselves, I really wanted to share some gentle thinking with them.
Why, dear one, would you expect yourself to perfectly do something that you’ve never done?
Can you allow yourself to just experience the act, and not anticipate the outcome?
Before you belittle what you bring to the table, ask yourself if you would tell a child the same.
When you notice what your neighbor has done, as you applaud it, can you give that also to yourself?
Denying yourself that reward does nothing to move you forward, indeed it can make you stuck.
And assuming you will fail in advance, only makes you experience the failure twice!
Why not expect great things?!? And Celebrate twice!
Even if you consider it a failure, your attempt was magnificent in its honoring of you by trying!
What if….
What if….. you let all those thoughts, just fall away.
And enjoyed the moment?
And in that moment you saw all that you are….all the possibility.
As you let go of all that is considered wrong or not wanted, be in awe of all that amazing potential.
Can you see that you are not the action, but the potential?
You are not the words, but the intention.
You don’t have to be different, do more. 
You just have to be.
Take a deep breathe, let it all go.                     
Allow……..Be.
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I like to use an art exercise to support the inquiry. For this one I chose alcohol inks because you CAN'T control the outcome, you have to just let the magic happen.  Then we used stamps to own the design.
Be gentle with yourselves!
​~deb♥
2 Comments

Red Thread Circles (Day 29 blogging with Effy Wild)

4/29/2021

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For me, the Red Thread is a symbol of the connection we all have to each other deep down in the energy that is our soul.  Red threads have a symbolic energy meaning and recur throughout our physical world: blood vessels, DNA, fibers in our food and clothing; from fractals & nanotechnology to images of far galaxies. 
The Red Thread is used in circle as a reminder to tend that inner connection and thereby our neighbors. 
The Red Thread circle creates a space, or container, for compassion and allowing, for self and one another.  In that space you can feel a sense of belonging, witnessed and supported, as well as offering that to others.   You carry that Red Thread from the circle as a reminder that you have that support and as your piece to live every day with compassion. 
​If we could cultivate this type of interaction with others and model it for our children, maybe we wouldn’t be seeing some of the violent and hopeless happenings going on with our youth or the negative climate splattered all over the news.
Creativity is a way of expressing yourself as individual and can be beneficial in helping create space for compassion by becoming present and being mindful.   My goal is to develop a program based around Red Thread Circles and using art activities to reinforce those compassionate connections first to self and then to others.  I am currently holding monthly Circles at my artist cooperative and looking at branching out to offer them in the work place, social groups etc.  It’s great support for those in especially stressful fields.
(my training for Red Thread Guide is through Shiloh Sophia at Musea.org)
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Blessed are the creatives (day 28 blogging with Effy Wild)

4/28/2021

22 Comments

 
A couple of summers ago I spent the summer training to be a Red Thread Circle Guide.
The creates a container of safety, allowing and compassion.  Those who enter in to the circle know and agree to these terms and offer them to their fellow circle members.
As a founding member of the artist cooperative in my little town, I get frustrated when the "business" overtakes the creativity.  So when I had the chance to hold a circle for my fellow members, I felt called to right this poem for them.  I feel it deeply in my heart as my belief is that creativity is the expression of your very soul, your essence delivered and transformed into the physical.
For all the beloved creatives out there, don't forget.
My Creative Beloveds
 
You, dear one, were born a creative soul
Your soul craves that expression.
It’s an expression of joy and beauty
Of truth.
Your truth.  Of where you are
And where you are from
It began as a baby creating sounds of joy
A coo and gurgle, meaningless but full of feeling.
As the child grew, expression came through sheer joyous movements.
A dance of abandon
Then one day a pencil found its way into your hand
It became a tool for that expression.
Sometimes joyous, sometimes painful
But always beautiful.
You put your hands in clay and pushed your soul into it
It’s there, in that pot.
As you pushed pigment across a canvas
Your dream came to life for others
Your spark lives in your mark.
Be fearless in your sharing of it
This is your world
You belong here
Be fierce in your belonging


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22 Comments

Of the Moss (day 27 blogging with Effy Wild)

4/27/2021

6 Comments

 
A couple of years ago I was commissioned to some artwork. She told me the colors in the room and then gave me free reign.  I'd seen an image of an old door with stone stairs leading down.  So I began creating my world on canvas.  Interestingly, in the midst of it's creation, I read a newsletter from Nikol Rogers.  It was about tending the moss.  I've always been struck by this synchronicity and I felt like it lead me to some answers of why I was drawn to the deep mossy areas of the steps. I was inspired to write about it while I was working.
 
The door is not what you think.
We are told all our lives that when one door closes, another opens.
Is it an obstacle or a possibility?  that door
Must we search for the key?  is the key what is needed?
Or is what is needed, the key?
That way may lay wondrous mysteries; our brain likes to think about those prospects, in bright shiny glowing images with a trill of music, always looking forward.
 
And yet my feet hesitate….my hand falls to my side
I am drawn to the depths…
Down there is the cool.
Is it ominous?  That dark?
Or is it simply peace.
The mosses have consumed.
They come to disturbed sites, stabilize, and make space for new growth.
Quietly, slowly, firmly.  Not active, yet steady.  It beckons
Possibly my soul is seeking to not seek.
 To just…..Be


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6 Comments

Randomness (day 26 blogging with Effy Wild)

4/26/2021

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I had a busy weekend, cleaning up my yard to hopefully seed some grass and cleaning out my back cabinet that has just been accumulating more and more things since I moved into this house (6 years ago?). They are offering Spring Clean-up in my town this Thursday, you put your stuff out on the curb and they pick it up. It's nice, I missed it last year; loaded up a bunch of stuff to put out, then looked around wondering why no one else had stuff out.....found the flyer and I was a day late. This year, while I should have done more than  just the cabinet, I'm 3 days early!
  • I apparently bookmarked a website "how to cut brownies"....
  • I have a callus developing on my finger that I have no idea why....
  • I'm frustrated that my monthly painting challenge garnered ZERO interest...
  • Is that a callus on my thumb too? Did those two digits get together on something?
  • Someone or something took off with my grill brush...
  • Technical difficulties are still plaguing me, just in a different area now.... 
I think that's all I have for today.  I'm a little strung out from an allergy attack yesterday, brain isn't firing on all synapses.
​Holding space for that healing...♥

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snapped this with my phone a few years ago.  Zoomed in, cropped a bit and added sunspots with a filter, turned out pretty cool!
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Late start (day 24 blogging with Effy Wild)

4/24/2021

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I got a late start on my day this morning, and ended starting late on my blog. So short it is.
Got a few things started today, finished a couple.
My car is in peices while trying to figure out my no sound stereo.
I want some more chocolate. 
And I happilyg just discovered the Masked Singer has been back for 7 episodes, so I have bingeing ahead!
I hope everyone is enjoying the weekend!
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Wrapping up the week (day 23 blogging with Effy Wild)

4/23/2021

6 Comments

 
It feels like it's been a super long week. Possibly because I had to recover from my busy weekend and it took pretty. much. all. week.
I think I'm there.
I dipped my toe into my new venture: airbrush tattoos. I thought it might be a way to make some extra cash this summer.  Time will tell.  Even for free, I only had 3 customers....that doesn't bode well, however, it was limited exposure at our art cooperative, I'm REALLY hoping festivals will be better attended since they are out doors.  Our city is planning on some additional maker's markets too, so fingers crossed.
I've tried to come up with designs that will appeal to adults as well since I really enjoyed getting an airbrush tattoo years ago.
Keeping myself entertained, I did one on myself last Saturday. The tattoo looked really cool, my photography, not so much.
Have a fantastic weekend bloggy groupies!
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6 Comments

Are you ****ing kidding me?! (day 22 blogging with Effy Wild)

4/22/2021

6 Comments

 
I'm trapped in reaction, yup! After just talking about how it's a good idea to pause, I'm rushing in.
After the issues yesterday trying to get the blog function to work on Weebly, I had more issues this morning. It will let me post or discard, but nothing was coming up for an entry. So I just hit post, let's see what happens.  It posted! Just a date. So trying to delete that off the page I ended up inadvertently deleting yesterday too! ARGGGhhhh.....
I'm sad. 
There is no going back, I tried.
I'm regretful that I didn't think about copying from the other page I had it open on still. But that is a hindsight thing.
not helpful thoughts
  • why can't things just go right
  • why can't Weebly just work!
  • why didn't you leave well enough alone and leave the one little blank post
  • why why why 
I wonder, is there a way to stop that all before it happens?  Not the problems, but the reactions.
Do I really have to go through it all every time? 
Yup!  And just like Kyle Cease loves to say, "And I love it."
WTF? Love stupid things happening and then reacting more stupidly? YUP!
Because it's there, it happened, why NOT love it? Fighting it is going to take SO much more energy.
It's allowing. It's space in the container.
and it takes practice. every damn day.
(Kyle Cease is a motivational/transformational speaker who developed the program "Evolving Out Loud")
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6 Comments

Playing safe (day 20 blogging with Effy Wild)

4/20/2021

4 Comments

 
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I wrote a completely different blog. I chickened out on posting it.
It was a rant about social media. I am going to save it for after the 30 days is finished. I just don't want to put something so volatile out there in this public of forum. (the group)
So picking a more safe topic, I've been thinking about developing a practice that I share with a membership on art journaling as a way of holding myself accountable. I realized years ago that art was healing for me. And I have a firm belief that creativity is the essence of the soul. Since then I've looked for a good way to share that with others. I've realized that for it to be truly beneficial it needs to be a practice, likely a daily one.
I'm not good about a daily practice. I do art often for sure. And I know a daily practice would benefit me in the mindfulness area.  But I am having a hard time making it a practice. EVEN though I KNOW it would be good for me.  AND I know it would be good for other people! And I know that if I have people depending on me, I'm more likely to do it.
BUT - that just further proves and abets the fact that I am better at taking care of other people than I am at taking care of myself.  I'll do it for someone else, but not for me. So if I put myself in the position of "having" to take care of my members, am I actually hamstringing myself? And not taking care of myself?
Or am I buying into psychobabble, and I would actually be in service to others, which is a legitimate calling....Does a calling have to have a clear and concise syllabus? Cuz mine doesn't! 
Interesting how I can flip flop on all this. Maybe it's just fear. Likely it's just fear.  Did I say I picked a safe topic? I meant for the reader in general, I'm never safe. Am I ever safe?  I feel safe doing art. Mostly.
Ok, I feel safe just being creative. With no end goal. And that's why all the above.
holding space for my ramblings....
​~deb


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4 Comments

Rinse & Repeat (day 19 blogging with Effy Wild)

4/19/2021

2 Comments

 
(Really day 17 for me, but who's counting.  Wait.....IS someone counting? O_o)
Yes, my humor is an acquired taste, but I digress, again.  I did miss blogging over the weekend.  I was doing airbrush tattoo demonstrations on Saturday at my artist cooperative, and spending much needed time with my daughters that evening for my oldest daughter's birthday.  I'm not going to try to say I didn't have the time, but I didn't have the energy. And that's ok.
I was overwhelmingly grateful for all the responses to my last post on "Take a deep breath, and forgive yourself everything"!  It really resonated.
And most of us forget! We forget to offer ourselves that forgiveness on a regular basis.  We drop back into our old habits and before we know we are buried deep in that pile of yuck.  Hey, you can forgive yourself for that too.  
What I've discovered is that I have to take that breath and forgive myself many times a day.
We are such goal oriented, linear thinking creatures, that we think once we've learned something, we've reached our goal and that's it! We should be happy, at peace, whatever.  The truth is, life isn't really linear. It's a cycle.  Things are going to come back around and you are going to need to deal with them again and again and again.  It feels like that forgiveness didn't really work, because I keep ending up back here.  It did work. But you have to keep doing it. It has to become a habit and practiced every day.
I call that "Rinse & Repeat​".
I'm considering developing and offering that practice to a membership.  I find it helps to have support and for me, accountability. But that is another post.
.....with compassion
~deb♥
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(above is from my first art showing almost 5 years ago)
2 Comments
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